The One Change That Worked: How I Conquered After-Work Stress Through an Surprising Find in the Attic

I frequently become like a coiled spring after work. My shoulders grow tense, my breath turns fast and shallow. Usually, the sound of my laptop lid slamming shut would be followed by the squeak of a cork pulled from a bottle of red, wine poured quickly into a glass, that initial sip marking the end of the workday.

Then, several months back, I came across my now-adult son’s old school recorder in the attic. I idly blew into it, instantly reminded of the time when it drove me crazy – his daily practice a violent assault on my eardrums, the sharp sounds echoing in my mind long after he slept.

But rather than consigning it to the bin, I took it down, along with a book – Very Easy Recorder Tunes. As a child, I was the least musical child ever. I’d had recorder lessons at infant school, but never had the opportunity to learn other instruments.

Searching online for recorder tutorials, I viewed many kid-friendly YouTube clips, and got a fingering guide on paper. I searched “easiest recorder tunes”, I felt excited when I played a recognizable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Admittedly, a typical young child could learn it quickly, but as a tone deaf, impatient and stressed 51-year-old, it felt like a huge achievement.

My son questioned my actions (and please could I stop), but I persevered – I liked the way the recorder made me feel. My inability to remember anything forced me to focus on the music sheet, and painstakingly copy the finger positions. My breathing slowed down, I was focused, and after nailing that initial shaky melody, I was overjoyed. I had managed to play music.

Today, after some months, I can handle other children’s songs and a passable Ode to Joy. Yes, my timing is rubbish, and I must jot down note names, but for me, it’s not about skill or being a musician – it’s purely about the joy it provides and how it clears my mind while playing.

I learned that few kids play the recorder today, which was no doubt music to parents’ ears, yet it made me wistful for my school years, as well as my son’s.

I make it a habit to play each night after work as my first activity, and during those 20 minutes, I am in my own little world. Afterward, I feel refreshed and happy.

My friends think it’s hilarious, but one very wise therapist friend told me I was not only lowering my stress levels, and boosting mental skills, like memory and sound processing, which is precious at my age. And in terms of my day-to-day wellbeing, it’s truly an ode to joy.